Panties

I stayed up till 6 am doing laundry. When i awoke at 10 I remember I had left two dryers going& went to gather my things. I noticed the bright purple lace panties I had worn last night hanging on the shelf above the washers. I suppose I had dropped them. I held the panties to my face and sniffed the crotch to see if I had dropped them before or after the wash.  Then I noticed the label that said xs  And realized that I had just sniffed someone else's panties 

I Thought He Was Dead! Damn Geriatric Mutt

After work I found my dog curled up on my fav latex fetish dress fast asleep. He's completely deaf so I've learned to gently pet him to wake Him up. He didn't move. I put down my bags and even though I know he can't hear me I started calling his name. I shook him, tapped his nose then Picked him up. Still no response. I put him back down and stared at his stomach. I could see him breathing. I reached for my phone to call someone. But what could anyone else do. So we drove to the emergency pet hospital I carried him in and he suddenly and happily woke up. Wagged his tail and looked at me with those big brown puppy dog eyes of his.  My heart stopped racing.  I leaned forward, buried my face in his fur and let out a sigh of relief.  I'm pretty sure the vet thought I was on drugs. I had been DJn at the strip club my purple nd black hair pinned up elvira style, topped off with over sized pink and purple flowers, my tits looked like rockets peeking out from my tight black bustier top and I was wearing my usual amount of make up - just enough to make local drag queens jealous.  Then I stood there explaining that my dog was unresponsive but breathing as he sat there wagging his tail while fully conscious.  She said it sounds like he was just sleeping. #ThisIsMyRealLife