You Are Where You Put Yourself In Life

I started working out again... and again... and again.
It's like quiting smoking, there's tons of false starts before it finally sticks.

"You are where you put yourself in life."

I like that quote. If my life sucks it's cause I'm making decisions that lead to it sucking.

6 years ago I was on top of the world. I had lost 100lbs and won 5th place in my very first fitness competition. I kept competing until I was on team BC at Nationals! Then I stopped...

In 2007 I placed 2nd and I started dating this dude, let's call him Buddy.
I then went on to place 4th at Provincials, "Buddy" fell asleep in the front row and txt me all show asking when it was going to be over.
I didn't invite "Buddy" to the Nationals. He had nothing supportive to say. I placed 8th. I was jazzed that I didn't come int 9th! But that's not how "Buddy" saw things.

I stopped competing after that. I kept working out with "Buddy" at the local community centre and tried to hang onto my love for fitness but every time a box of suppliments would come from one of my sponsors he would take product for himself. He built his dream body. He looked great.

I remember him standing infront of me at the treadmill the last day I every worked out in public. He told me that I was lucky to be dating him cause he's only gone out with thin beautiful girls. But he made an exception for me cause he thought I was a good investment.
I burst into tears and left the treamdill to hide in the changroom.

I never went back to that gym. Everyone knew me there, they knew of my competitions and were so supportive. But they also liked my boyfriend who was there every day. Why was he there every day? Well for the last 18 months of our relationship he didn't have a job, he just worked out. I paid all of our bills and slowly started to hate my life.

"You are where you put yourself in life"

and I put myself if a pretty sucky situation.

I finally broke up with "Buddy"

I've been single ever since. I've dated. But no one's become boyfriend material. In the last few years of being single I've achieved so much. I've acomplished things I had only ever day dreamed of. I've been to places I only wished I could go before. And I've met people I pray I get the honor of growing old with. I've regained a ton of happiness.

It's true. You are where you put yourself in life. So where do I want to put myself? I want to be right back at my happiest part of life when I was feeling unstoppable. 

http://thesamanthamack.blogspot.ca/2011/11/my-fitness-competition-nov-2006.html

So I started the journey again.
I'm one solid week into military inspired workouts. My ass aches when I walk up stairs, My abs tremble when I first sit up in bed in the mornings. I feel incredible.

 Many people told me I couldn't and shouldn't... back in the day. And I'm sure they will again. But it's my choice to keep those people around or to let them go.

"You are where you put yourself in life"