Dating is so Obnoxious

written March 5 2011
In my (almost) year of being single this is what I've learned.

When you wear beautiful expensive lingerie you're jinxing yourself... No ones ever gonna see it.
Wear the underwear with the hole and BAM! You'll have to pray he rips your clothing off fast enough to not notice your trashy wall mart purchase.

Clean your home, buy the aphrodisiac scented candles, elegant bedding, and matching towels.
By the time laundry day comes and you're sleeping on that fuzzy wolf blanket that you bought as a joke at the gas station on your last road trip, the candles are nothing but a blackened wick in a puddles of wax that clearly can no longer cover the smell of your wet dog... And it took not one but four of those nice new matching towels to soak up all the mud that so called adorable dog dragged into the house after that late night walk..... Then, and only then, will the stars align and that irresistible hunk of a man will come knocking at your door.

I remember that time we ran to my truck to escape the warm spring rain and I couldn't find my keys... You pushed me up against my wet truck, my back soaked, but I didn't care. As our bodies pressed into one another, Your hands tangled in my hair, we kissed Under the moonlight... It could have been perfect.... but our teeth kept banging into eachother like teenagers stealing kissed in your moms basement... Deadening the spontaneous romance in mere seconds.

Cupid is a sadistic bitch in bed with Murphy's law. My love life is merely a comedy show meant to entertain Aphrodite as she looks down from the heavens.

The Happy Couples Kiss

Written Jan 1 2011

3 2 1 Happy New Year! The happy couples kiss. Most of my co workers are surprised when their parners sneak up to the bar to celebrate with them as they work. An indescribable joy fills the room. "Where's Your Man?" they ask, as I walk through the crowd. I slip into the shadows backstage, taking cautious deep breaths so no one will hear my sadness. There in the darkness I hear the cautious breaths of the hot blonde with the big fake boobs... I'm not the only one who hates New Years.

The Dressing Room

Written
November 18th 2010


The dressing room in the strip club is where all the action happens. It's where you will find the girls just being themselves. Back stage is the only place where we don't have to put on an act. It's where we discuss the mayhem of the night, and mock the majority of men that attend the club. The dressng room is also where we go to relax. For some this is where we go for quiet time although sometimes it's hard to avoid the drama.
There's 3 kinds of strippers.
The popular girls: Usually the money makers of the club. blonde, fake tits, expensive clothes and fancy cars. They often have some good looking boyfriend.
The alternative girls: Their music selection tells a story, they usually have more than one tattoo, and dream of being an artists.
The nerdy girls: the girls who go to school. (it's not just what a girl tells you so you'll think she isn't an uneducated stripper who was raised in a trailer park) They're the girls in the corner cramming for a test between shows.
Being a combination off all of the above is my idea of the perfect woman. Smart, fun, sexy, beautiful, independant and secure with her sexuality. (what more coulda guy want? apparantly lot more, these are some of the loneliest girls I've ever met)
The dressing room is also where we go for man advice. When you get a group of girls together in a room with nothing to do, "men" always seem to quicly become the main topic.
I can't count how many times i've seen a girl break down in the dressing room over a guy who broke her heart. I remember when it happened to me.
I was crushed. All I wanted to do was stay at home cry and eat junk food in my bed. Instead I went to work. I didnt go for the money. Or out of fear of getting fired. I went because i needed the company of the dressing room. the comfort of the girls... my family. Shortly after ariving at work I began to feel better. Soon I was laughing and decided to forget about the heartache that I thought was going to be the end of me. I did it without the help of tears, junk food or the warmth of my lonely bed. All i needed was the warmth of the girls in the dressing room.

I wanted my name in lights

Just a little attention atractor

entertainers like to seeem complicated
but we're not complicated.

I must be psychotic,
I must be demented to think that I'm worthy of all this attention,
for all of this money, you worked really hard for
I slept and laid while you worked at the dug store.
Attention is my drug
I am an addict
But i get paid to indulge in my habbit
It's all an illusion
It's all an illusion

http://www.youtube.com/user/boburnham#p/u/0/Eo9pU1q8sy8

Muffin Head March 29 2002 - Dec 20 2011

It's been one week since my Mr. Muffin Head passed away. I hate the stillness in my home. Every time I open the front door I listen to hear him jump off the couch. I strain through the silence to hear the click clack of his nails agains the hard wood floors (a sound I once hated) as he'd scurry to greet me with his big goofy face. I miss him so very much and I'm pretty sure I always will. Every morning I catch myself reaching off the side of the bed to pet him. But his spot is empty now. I took him with me everywhere. To the radio station, to the tattoo shop, snowboarding, skim boarding, trail running, parades, music video shoots, he even toured with me across western Canada, he never left my side. Now there is an emptiness that never leaves my side. I miss my Muffin.

NIce Girls Finish Last

As any smart woman knows, playing by the rules of a male-dominated world will only get you so far. Nice girls - finish last.

You believe i am more than satisfied being a girl who behaves badly. That my morals are questionable, and my attitude needs adjusting. The truth is, I think it's entirely possible to rule the world while wearing a pretty dress and stilettos.

I'm getting awful sick of drippy chicks in love with the fantasy of macho heroes. Women who get kidnapped and need saving from some villain. There are far too many extraordinarily thick-headed girls going out alone and unarmed in the middle of the night to investigate weird chainsaw noises coming from the abandoned farmhouse by the old cemetery, knowing perfectly well that a crazed serial killer is on the loose. Without bothering to tell anyone where they're going.

Apart from needing to be rescued, these chicks are so unnecessary, there presence seems mainly designed to prove that despite all the so called Hero's male bonding, he's still 100% heterosexual.
How much time can these guys spend pumping iron in the gym with their buddies, checking out each other's muscles, and still maintain they're straight?

On the flip side:
The more metro sexual men become, the less they man up. And then they're shocked when they feel emasculated when they notice that their damsel wasn't so helpless afterall, and took care if business on her own, once she was sick of waiting for him to give a damn. (let's face it, a girl can only wait so long.) She's tougher than you expected yet still soft enough to be moved by a sweet man...

So welcome to the game. A skilled balance between beauty and brains.

You will be intoxicated, it will be complicated.

Don't analyze it. Don't try to figure it out. Just shut up and take it, like the big tough man you are. And don't worry, in the end you'll still be the hero in the spotlight. Because behind every great man....

Boys, Grow a Pair

 One of my biggest turn offs:
Boys who have to brag about their car, boat, house, watch, etc to prove they're special.

Dear Boys,
Grow a personality and stop hiding behind "stuff" to prove that you have value. I don't care about stuff. You are not your "things." It's just useless junk. Grow a personality, be charming, witty, smart.
For gawds sake you are more valuable than the crap you bought. Your "things" don't make you cool. You and you alone are most likely a fantastic human. Grow a pair and stand up for YOU, not your possessions.
sincerely
Samantha

Tonight's story starts with just another day at the office... aka another night at the strip club.

Tonight in the bar a handome man tried to chat me up.
His opening sentance was about how hot his car is. He then tried to get me to go outside to see it.

I instantly laughed and decided to bust this poor boys balls for my own amusment.
I know it's a little mean, But I couldn't help myself. I mocked him,
"I have no personality or redeming quialities that would make girls like me but I have a pretty car. oh boy, that'll make you like me"

He took my razzing like a champ... or he didn't get it.
"Here I'll show you a picture" he said. "George Knows, He's seen it."

about 10 mins of banter went by. My point each time being "your STUFF wont impress me. Be a man, come out from behind your toys and talk to me like a real boy Pinocchio" I even tried to help the poor fool out. So what do you do? Do you like your job? What did you really want to be when you grew up? etc. All I could drag out of him is that his job made so much money he's getting a new toy.

I asked him his name. Let's call him BoBo.
"Listen BoBO, Introducing your self by bragging about crap you paid way too much for, your penthouse suite, your car, your boat, your glittery shirt, etc. Makes you lame. Grow a personality. Make a girl smile. Try anything other than bragging about your stuff. You're far too young for a midlife crisis. Fuck the car. It's often said men with fancy cars are over compensating for 'something' anyways."

He then went on about how he liked to work out. AND I KID YOU NOT. He flexed his bicep and begged me to touch it. I held onto the bar to keep from falling over laughing. But, the damn fool persisted through my over dramatic laughter.
"No, feel it. It's hard I promise."
So I gave in and gave his buldging bicep a squeeze as I rolled my eyes.

he continued,
"OMG I love you let me take you out. I've got lots of money"

"It's unfortunate that your so handsome, your blatent stupidity has gone unnoticed for what? 30-35 years.... Let me guess you have a line of credit. That's not 'having lots of money' that's having lots of potential debt"

"ya but it still works." he said. (that's the funniest come back he had all night, still makes me laugh)

"why would you want to take me out. I've shot down everything you have to say. I've made fun of you and treated you like my verbal punching bag. I think you're mind numbing, you're actually numbing my mind, and I want to JUMP off the roof each time your open your mouth."

"ya but you have great tits. we'd look good together."

"I'll be on the roof"

Resume in Progess

Events I've hosted, or performed at:

Sandra Wichham Fall Classic 2006
Northern Classic 2007
BC Provincial Championships 2008
Canadian National Championships 2008
Naughty but Nice Taboo Sex Show Vancouver 2007-2011
Naughty but Nice Taboo Sex Show Abbotsford 2008-2011
23rd annual Norton Bike Show 2008
Stripper Tuesday 99.3FM 2008
Dancers 4 Cancer Vancouver 2008-2010
Tempest Exotic Circus 2009
Stiletto Storm's Seduction Clinic 2009
Exotic Goddess SEXPO 2009
The C Word (fighting female genital mutilation over seas) 2009
Jeff O'Neil Golf Tourney 99.3FM 2009
Adult Entertainment Award Show 2010
Mcleans Magazine April 2010
24hrs News Canucks Pre Game Pod cast 4 episodes 2010
Echo Fest with Cheeki Cherry June 2010
Penthouse Amateur Contest July 2010
Vancouve Gay Pride Parade 2010
99.3FM Jeff O'neil Show! August 2010
Diva's Live - Disney at the ODYSSEY AUG 2010
24 Hours News Vancouver AUG2010
House of Seduction August 2010
Firefighter Calendar release party Sept 2010
Mr/Ms/Miss gay Vancouver Pageant Oct 2010
GLITTER MACHINE Calendar Release Party @ the Caprice Oct 2010
Penthouse "So you thing you can strip" contest Oct 2010
Back Up dancers for "Dream Sound" Oct 2010
Diva's Live "ROCK OUT" @ Celebrities Nov 2010
Co-Host of CiTR 101.9FM QueerFm since Dec 2010
Diva's Live Valentine's Edition @ Celebrities Feb 2011
Vancouver Adult Entertainment Award Show June 2011

My Sex Life - Where Is The Love?

Written July 4 2010

I've realized that I've fucked, been fucked, had crazy sex, worthy of top Shelf Porn. But I can't remember "making love" with any of my previous boyfriends. (or guys who fell into my bed)

I feel like I'm a great notch on the belt, I'm a fantastic fling, or story to tell your friends. I don't expect guys to stick around, or consider seriously dating me. Ever. (see note "you can't date an exotic entertainer")

After talking to other entertainers and studly bouncers... It's a comon feeling. We feel like more of a prize. A one time shot. People want to fuck us but don't think we'll stick around, or be trustworthy, etc. It could be the job, the image, the stigma, the rumors, It could be for many reasons... At least it's nice to know it's not just me...

Because I fear the "fuck n chuck" I've developed a horrible habbit to detach my self, so that the sex is more of a game, or a sport. Thus I can enjoy it while being detached emotionaly.
I'll find the man's biggest insecurity and make casual jokes, mid action, So that the men I'm with feel less confident, So that they know They're flawed and not actually good enought for me. Not that I actully think that - I usually adore him, But my insecurities about not being good enough for them, get in the way.. so it's a little trick I created to make men think that I'm not actualy into them either, and I'm also just in it for the shag. This way I'm not the punch line when the chuck part of the "fuck n chuck" comes because I'll have broken them down so much that they'll think the chuck is mutual.

So really my insecurity of being unwanted is encouraging men to not want me. vicious circle i've created, huh.

I never realized that this is what I was doing until now. But It's what I can remember doing for so long. I now realize that I've missed out on that passion, that connection, that emotional satisfaction of trusting someone enought to "make love" instead of just offering detached sport sex

I feel so stupid. I see now that I was encouraging my own fear and disapointment. Not that it was all bad. I did have some fun memorable times. But I do feel bad for some of the men who's confidence I distroyed, if only for a night. No one deserves that vicious mind game. If I'm that unsure of how you feel about me then I just should not be humping you. At all.

Since noticing this. I've made the conscious effore to change.I don't want to be hurtful or heartless. I don't want to be "that girl."

It's hard to give it your all. Trust isn't easy. But going on cushioning myself from fear of hurt feelings isn't really working. So for the man who gets to be "that guy" I'm giving my all, all my appreciation, my adoration, my attention, my trust, my love... if that's going to not be good enough then There's nothing for me to apologize for,be embarassed or upset about. It was all I had to give.

But then I think... "something tells me YOU shouldn't be trusted."
so till you prove me wrong, YOU get nothing.

Making Love

"All men fear death. It's a natural fear that consumes us all. We fear death because we feel that we haven't loved well enough or loved at all, which ultimately are one and the same. However, when you make love with a truly great woman, one that deserves the utmost respect in this world and one that makes you feel truly powerful, that fear of death completely disappears. Because when you are sharing your body and heart with a great woman the world fades away. You two are the only ones in the entire universe. You conquer what most lesser men have never conquered before, you have conquered a great woman's heart, the most vulnerable thing she can offer to another. Death no longer lingers in the mind. Fear no longer clouds your heart. Only passion for living, and for loving, become your sole reality. This is no easy task for it takes insurmountable courage. But remember this, for that moment when you are making love with a woman of true greatness you will feel immortal."

Defined by Men?

  So many women were defined by the men in their lives: they were dames and broads, singled out as real lookers for their gams that wouldn't quit. To get away from one man, they had to latch onto another. Only through guile and blatant sexuality could they achieve any power, and then they were punished for it.
  But not her. For her, men were accessories at best, nuances at worst.
  She is quite capable of getting in and out of trouble on her own. She may often make the wrong decisions but at least she has the opportunity to make these decisions for herself.
  She gives the simple minded blokes a reason to live and beat each other up - for which they are not as grateful as they should be.

I Dare You

Life is your runway...
Own the catwalk.
Take center stage.
You are bold and fearless.
You are sexy and smart.
Dare to be glamorous.
Dare to be edgy
If you can dream it,
You can be it.
I dare you.

My Little Brother

my little brother is an amazing man
so selfless and giving, he bends over backwards for his friends. he goes out of his way to
help the people who are important to him. He's drivin to the middle of nowherer in the middle of the night to save his friends in distress. He is protective of his friends and his family. he's one of the most responsible people i know. And he doesn't think twice when life requires him to "man up." He doesn't pass the buck, he doesn't leave people hanging. He does what he says and says what he does. He is brave, He is thoughtfull, He really is our local hero.

I really am quite impressed by him, his values, his standards, his choices... He's quite simply just an all around good guy.

He's not irrational. He listens. and takes everything to heart. He's not suave with cheesey lines. He doesn't dress to impress. When you see him it's usually just his legs sticking out from under a friends broken down truck. He's not a player. He's honest and says what he thinks. He wont lead you on, or fill your ear with broken promises. He is who he is, what you see is what you get. No hidden surprises, no tricks, no games.

So ladies...
Count your lucky stars if you get to meet this guy.

BUT if you have the audacity to use him, trick him, hurt him... watch out for me. He's my little brother, and I am very protective of him.

Leaving My Mark on the World

I know I'm loud, outspoken, at times larger than life and maybe sometimes a bit intimidating.. But under all the hairspray and eye shadow it's my goal to be the sweetest girl in the universe. Yeah, I'm a great set of tits But I want to be remembered for being throughful, kind, giving...

In my past people helped me when I just couldn't do it on my own. I'll never be able to pay them back, The gift was too much. It was hard to accept. But to them it was nothing. It made them happy to help me.. And what was a tremendous gift to me was heart warming happiness to them..

I now seek this heart warming happiness. (Pay it forward) I count my success in how many lives I can touch not in how many dollars are in my bank account.

Whatever time I have left...
I want to give myself to loving people, and helping people.

Living in the NOW, not what could be or what might be...

June 2 2010


Why are we so afraid to turn off our cell phones? Why do we insist on watching television? Why can we earn advanced degrees, run businesses, and give birth while barely batting an eyelash, yet the mere thought of spending a Saturday night alone makes us panic? We are so strong, yet so weak. We are so brave, yet so afraid.

Could it be that "making it" means being grateful for this very moment in life? Could it be that the key to fulfillment is learning to live fully in the present instead of constantly contemplating the future? Could it be that happiness can only be found in this moment, that the elusive "there" for which we endlessly strive is actually 'here', in front of us, easily within reach?

We are not owed anything in life. This existence itself is a gift and for it we are forever in dept. The only was to pay back this debt is with gratitude. Life owes me nothing, but I owe everything to life.

It is your choice whether to view the proverbial glass as half-empty or half-full. You can choose to label your life as lacking and dissatisfying, or you can label it complete and fulfilling.

Living in the moment... I want to master this. I want to live in the now, not the what could be, not the what might be... Just now. This is my reality, this is all I have to work with, I want to embrace it and make it into the best moment I can.

Dancing is not something you do with your head. It is something you feel with you body. Dancing is best when thought has been abandoned.

Dare to do the impossible. It seems that so many of us, so much of the time, are asked by the world to do things that feel utterly impossible. And so many of us, so much of the time, find strength from God knows where to simply make it happen.

I want to embrace everything that life offers me. I want to take comfort in the wild, mysterious natural order of things. I don't want to spend my life watching the clock. I don't want to punch a time card. I don't want to make a checklist. I don't want to live my life like a day planner, scheduling and organizing. I not want to panic,
"when am I going to meet Mr.Right? When am I going to have babies? When am I going to get my book published? When am I going to see my first gray hair? When am I going to be a success? When am I going to die?"
I want to wait for the events of my life the way a little girl waits for Santa Clause, excited and wide-eyed. I want to live like this all the way through to my last breath.

The purpose of this life is not to find one perfect, all-encompassing mate. (No offence to all you happy couples) It is not to mindlessly have babies. It is not to gain notoriety or fame or fortune. The purpose of this life is to find that place inside yourself where you can remain peaceful and optimistic no matter what the outside world throws your way.

I blatantly refuse to spend all my energy making the perfect future that I forget to experience today.
Sometimes we need to stop analyzing the past, stop planning the future, stop figuring out precisely how we feel, stop deciding with our minds exactly what we want our hearts to feel, sometimes we just have to go with the flow and just enjoy life.

This moment right here, right now is all I have - I want it to be a moment to remember.

You can hump and exotic dancer.. but you can't date one.

 May 20 2010

So you've spotted a beautiful woman who you'd love to date. But if she's an adult enterainer, that complicates things. There are lots of stereotypes you need to be aware of (and ignore) before you make your move, or else you'll ruin your chances of ever getting to know her better.

I think if you asked a random man "so and so the ______________ (adult entertainer of whatever genre) is coming out with us" the dude would be thrilled. It's cool to hang out with someone with an exciting title, or job...
But when it comes to dating that kind of girl...
It takes a special type of man. Boy are they few and far between.
Boyfriends get protective. They don't like to share, and instead of understanding the industry they don't want to hear it, and get crazy ideas in their heads.

I've come to face facts that guys want to date adult entertainers, but taking one home to your mom is a different story. Sure the girl is fun to hang out with, totally loyal and trustworthy, and a rock star in the bedroom.... if you're lucky.
but do you want some hot chick with a fantastic rack taking your kids to t-ball?? What will the neighbours think?!?
I mean wacking off to her plastic image is one thing. Heck humping her in real life is worthy of water cooler gossip, but be seen with her around your "normal" friends.... out of the question!
He'll make up fake job titles for you because if you're HIS girlfriend you have to be seen as a real person... Let me guess he'll tell his co workers you're a waitress at a bar... that's why you work nights... yeah they will believe that...

Guys want to go out with, hump, and party with adult entertainers.
But a relationship is out of the question... If a girl is on display to make money (strippers, web cam, porn star, waitresses, door girls, models, promo girls etc.) the special men in their lives go bonkers. They can't handle someone looking at their property... the fear turns to jealousy, and jealousy turns to an outrageous lack of trust, and the downward spiral begins...

Exotic Entertainers get lots of attention, in the club and oftentimes out of it. If you can't handle your partner receiving plenty of admiration, dating an entertainerr is probably not for you. Don't go into a relationship with a entertainerr thinking you can 'change' her or expect her to get another job. Either accept what she does or find someone else.

So guys want to go out, and if I'm lucky hump diddily bump! But it'll never last. I guess there is an expectation to every rule... but I'll keep believing that it'll never last. and maybe one day I'll be surprised.
Once a guy gets to know the person behind the stage name.. once he discovers that you're human and might possibly have flaws.... The attraction will be gone. You'll just be a real girl with a job that worries the heck out of him.
And who wants to date a real girl?

“I think men are afraid to be with a successful woman, because we are terribly strong, we know what we want and we are not fragile enough.”
Shirley Bassey

Samantha Mack Hosts Canada's First Adult Awards - May 2010

City hosts Canada's first adult awards

 

Porn industry award show recognizes support workers, advocacy organizations

 

By Sandra Thomas, Vancouver Courier

Read more: http://www.vancourier.com/entertainment/City+hosts+Canada+first+adult+awards/3025694/story.html#ixzz1fDaaic7Q

The first Canadian adult entertainment awards ceremony takes place next month at the Rio Theatre on East Broadway.
Annie Temple, one of the organizers of The Naked Truth Adult Entertainment Awards, said the June 9 event is likely the first adult industry awards show in Canada.
"There's been exotic dance competitions and the Feminist Porn Awards, but I googled and searched and couldn't find anything like this," said Temple, an exotic dancer. "I've also never heard of a show like this before in Canada either, and I'm in the industry."
Winners of the awards have been selected via online voting at NakedTruth.ca, a website about the adult entertainment industry. Temple said the voting was done by members of the website and were submitted from around the world. While some of the categories are to be expected at an adult industry awards show, such as favourite adult film and favourite male striptease artist, others are less obvious.
Temple said the awards were designed to acknowledge all aspects of the industry so categories were included to recognize support workers, sex worker advocates and advocacy organizations. WISH Drop-in Centre Society from Vancouver tied in the advocacy category with Montreal-based Stella, a community group that offers support to sex-trade workers. Vancouver-based Susan Davis was named favourite sex worker advocate. "We really appreciate what these workers do," Temple said.
Industry co-workers recognized include DJs, make-up artists, sex-industry business owners and even patrons. She added next year a "favourite driver" category will be included to recognize the drivers who escort sex-trade workers and dancers to work and often act as bodyguards.
A Vancouver adult film performer, who goes by the name Mz. Scream, was thrilled with the award she'll be receiving at the show for her particular ability with a biological function. Reached by phone in Hamilton Ont., a stop on her tour before heading to Montreal, she told the Courier an adult awards show was overdue in Canada.
"We have to be the least appreciated performers, but I feel that it's time we're recognized for our work," she said. "Other people who do a good job and make people happy are recognized for their work, so why shouldn't we?"
She said since Canada is recovering from the recent recession, the show was a timely opportunity to celebrate. "Adult entertainment is a huge industry that employs a lot of people in Canada," she said. "It's almost an essential service, because so many people are involved in making other people happy."
Temple said the awards are new and some of the international winners haven't responded to her queries. Following the awards show, hosted by entertainer Samantha Mack, ticket holders are invited to a "no cameras allowed" party where they can meet major players in the adult entertainment industry.
sthomas@vancourier.com

© Copyright (c) Lower Mainland Publishing

"Buying Sex Is Not A Sport" Global News Coverage

December 6 2009
Buying sex is not a sport.... on global... they're using photos of the PENTHOUSE and talking about how women (including women in strip clubs) are sold as sex slaves.... uh, I work there, and trust me no one's having sex.
They say that we've lost the ability to make decisions for ourselves. They are talking about how men are taking women, targeting girls and then taking them away from their friends and family shooting us up with drugs and selling us for sex. Men are hunting women...

Let's get this straight. Men are not all bad, evil, sex crazed neandrethals. Women (even those in strip clubs) CAN make decisions for themselves.
And pole dancing, is fun. Thats why women off all shapes and sizes are flocking to classes like tantra fitness. The dancers I work with enjoy dressing up and dancing. We feel sexy, we feel confident, we feel empowered, we get this great escape from the monotony of life as we use a stage name, and become a character for a few hours. It's fun, it's liberating.

There are some girls, who don't see it as a job. They use their time working at the strip club to party... and their cash goes to the bar tabs and they get suck having to work more to catch up on the bills. That could happen with ANY job. Girls anywhere who party to excess can make a poor decisions. Just like how girls anywhere who work hard and enjoy their jobs can be successful. It's not rocket science.

Don't assume that just because a girl has an amazing rack and 6 inch stilettos that she's a sex slave. Also don't assume that men who go to strip clubs are psychotic, sex crazed beasts praying on anyone with a vagina.

Vancouver Courier News

Feb 2009
"STRIPPED BARE"
...
For exotic dancer Samantha Mack, performing in "Vancouver" now means travelling to Cloverdale, Maple Ridge and Aldergrove. Fewer stage show opportunities also means an increased reliance on selling private dances and self-promotion--be it increasing her web presence or hawking autographed posters, condoms, lighters, fridge magnets and other personalized swag when she performs at clubs. Then there's the cost of "upkeep."
"I always joke that before I had implants, before I had a tan, before I had hair extensions, before I looked stripperific, you know I was making great money," laughs Mack.

She got into the business in 2005 after she lost 100 pounds, took pole dance lessons and changed her job description to what sounds like a Hollywood movie plot of lifeguard by day, stripper by night. "But as the years go by, it
definitely changes," says Mack, "and there are lots more young couples and girls who come in, and girls aren't known for being big tippers, girls aren't known for getting VIP dances, so at the bars it's not the old men's club that it used to be."
These days, Mack splits her schedule between competing in fitness competitions and dancing, although she spends less time at home. While the local strip club landscape dries up, it's booming in Alberta, fuelled by an influx of young men fresh off the oilrigs with disposable income and a few rowdy nights a week in which to spend it. "The next six months of my life looks like the majority of my time will be spent in Alberta," Mack says, a few days before embarking on an eight-week tour of the prairie province. "There's definitely more clubs, and more reliable clubs out there."
Besides an intimate knowledge of small-town Alberta, Mack says exotic dancing has given her the tools for starting her own business. Once she reaches the ripe old retirement age of 30, she plans to start a fitness company for large women "who want the chance to feel sexy and empowered."
"I've had to go headfirst into self-marketing. I feel I can run pretty much any business out there... You learn pretty quickly how to work with people and mediate the public and entice them into what you are trying to sell."
As for the decline of strips clubs in Vancouver, Mack thinks once the Olympics are over and "everyone calms down," the market will improve. "It's huge in Alberta right now, the quality of the shows, the quality of the girls--the positive attitude is fantastic. But I think once the Olympics are done, there will be an opportunity for girls again. It's just whether the people who are in the industry at the time want to take that opportunity."

My Fitness Competition Nov 2006

Sandra Wickham Fall Classic 2006

I had almost backed out 2 days ago. My trainer Lindsay told me I didn't work hard enough and maybe I should just keep training and try next time. Jenna told me I busted my ass and deserved to walk across that stage that this was for me not some medal around my neck or a trophy that will only collect dust on a shelf. She was right. I started this journey and I had to finish it. I emailed fitness models from my favorite magazines and Monica Brandt emailed me back the night before the show. She didn't know me. Her pics were glued to my training logs. She was my motivation. Such a strong woman yet so feminie and beautiful. I couldn't back out now. A real live fitness icon was cheering me on. I couldn't email her back and say, "oh sorry I'm a coward."

The stage lights were blinding. I stood in the 3/4 pose I was trained to hold. I couldn't feel my body anymore. This was over stimulation at it's finest. I could only hear my mom's voice cheering for me. Maybe because her voice was so recognizable to me. Maybe because she was cheering louder than anyone else. Maybe because afer years of being a school teacher she only has one volume in a loud auditorium.

They could only call 5 girls names. I was about to walk off stage when they called my number. Inside it felt like I exploded!!! Surely someone had made a mistake. I stood their shaking in my bikini.
"In 5th place... Samantha Mack"
If I wasn't so dehydrated I would have peed my pants right then and there. A medal was placed around my neck and I smiled as if I had just won the lottery. This was it! This was what loving yourself fleels like.

That night my mom had just gotten out of hospital to come see me. She cheered louder than anyone else. "Mistress T" was there too. (She wasn't known as Mistress T back then, she was just my girlfriend. My biggest source of support and encouragement. Not just encouragement towards fitness but towards any and all of my hair brained spontaneous ideas.) My mom had knit her a teal scarf and touque for winter and gave it to her at that show (random side note.) Mistress T and I drove home in my big brown monster truck. We walked up to Granville Street and she bought me the biggest slice of pizza ever. It was less satisfying than I had hoped. I was too exhausted to eat.

After "Mistress T" left my apartment I ordered from panago. I had craved pizza for 12 weeks. No matter how tired I was I had wanted it for so long now that no matter how much my stomach rejected it, my mind was going to love the taste of a tropical chicken pizza with extra pineapple!!!
That night I fell asleep with a bottle of coke under my arm and a panago pizza box on my lap.
I woke up the next morning with a bottle of coke under my arm and a mangled panago pizza box next to my satisfied looking Rottie, Mr Muffin Head. My dog had bad gas that day.


I went back to work at the No5 Orange the next night I brought my medal to show the roided out bouncers who had been cheering me on all week. I was so proud. And to my surprise, everyone was proud of me too.

How Far I've Come

Written: Sunday, November 05, 2006

Here's my story:

I was never a skinny kid. Never a cute kid. Big buck teeth, braces, head gear, retainers, glasses, perms, and a knee brace.

Why the knee brace? Cause my body was tired of holding up my chubby little body. Yes, I was that girl in ballette class who wore the knee brace. I was also that little girl who had to have her costumes custom made because your generic small, medium, and large, wasn't an option.

I was always told I was "strong." Or "big boned." AKA FAT!
My two best friends growing up were super thin. People always told them that they could be models when they grew up. No one ever told me that they thought I could be a model.
I cried myself to sleep, a lot, wishing that one day I would be pretty. Wishing that one day boys might pay attention to me. I wanted so badly just to be pretty.

After high school I lived in denial until I was 20.
I was barley fitting into my size 17 clothing and I honestly thought that my clothes were shrinking in the wash.
I was buying size 22 at one point. Did I clue in that I might be putting on weight??? NO I simply looked down and saw my big boobs and thought about how lucky I was to be blessed with huge knockers.

I have a million stories like these. But rather than prove how stupid I was let me get to the point.

I didn't think I was FAT I thought that fashion was getting smaller, to suit the growing asian population. Really, this is the way my brain worked.

Then one day I saw the light.....

Actually I was shoved into the light by a co-worker that I looked up to. I was a lifeguard at the time. I was about to take over on deck for my supervisor when she decided to tell me about the funny conversation she just had with a pool patron.
She said, "That lady over there asked me if you were my daughter. ha ha. I said, 'WHY, 'CAUSE WE'RE BOTH FAT!'"
And just like that my bubble burst. My supervisor thought I was fat. Oh God what happened to me!!! Who did this to me???? I'm FAT???!?!?!

I cried a lot that weekend. A LOT!!! I freaked right out. Come Monday, I had planned my revenge. I was gonna get skinny and rub it in their noses.

I bought the BODY FOR LIFE journal and started working out and eating healthier. And I wasn't quiet about it. I worked out at the gym at work so my supervisor would often walk by and see me working out before between and after shifts. I brought extra healthy food to share and pushed it in my supervisors nose when she went to the vending machine at lunch.

I was BCRPA certified in group fitness. Soon my classes were the most popular because week by week you could watch my body change. People started coming up to me in the gym asking for advice.
I went from fat girl to fitness guru!!!

I started telling people that I was going to compete in womens fitness one day.... Then I got cocky and said I'm going to compete in 2006. Now this was back in 2004 when I was still waddling around at 200+lbs. I believed it though. All I wanted was a career in fitness. I wanted to be amazing. My everyday was consumed by these thoughts.

The first 30lbs were the easiest. They just melted away. From then on it's slowly gotten harder and harder. Every 10lbs I would reward myself. When I hit 80lbs lost I treated myself to a pole dancing class.
Badda Bing Badda Boom. I became an Exotic Dancer.

Somehow the dreams of a career in fitness faded. Being an exotic dancer took over.

Then this August at my beach birthday party. My girlfriend (Jenna Weeks) tells me that she's training for a fitness competition.
My first thought:
BITCH! You can't compete. That's my dream!
My first words:
I want in!

The following Monday I met up with Lyndsay from www.competitionready.com and the journey picked up right where it left off.
It wasn't easy this time. Not like before. The diet is strict. The workouts left me limping. I pushed through. Not as well as I would have liked to. Life happens after all. I should have... could have tried harder.... wah wah wah. I don't need to make excuses. I've come too far to give up now.

So I'm sticking to my word. And I am competing in 2006. Nov18th. I may not get the highest marks. But I've earned my turn it the spotlight.
So I'm going to stand on that stage - and my smile will be genuine. For the fat little girl I used to be - This was her dream.